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One of the hardest parts of change is making the time and energy for it.  We so often throw up our own roadblocks or simply never give ourselves permission to do something fun, joyful, or just for “us.”   Well, you have permission.  You always did.  It’s very easy to lose sight of the fact that the best way we help others is by keeping ourselves healthy, active, and engaged in the lives we want.  Thinking and Acting in the way that we want.  Believing in ourselves and being kind towards ourselves. That is a hidden cycle at work in all of us.

Our thoughts lead to feelings, which leads to actions and sustained action over time leads to our beliefs, both good and bad.

 Thoughts    lead to       Feelings

Feelings      become     Actions

Actions       form our    Beliefs 

Beliefs are the glass we see the world through

For example, what if someone was raised to believe dogs were wonderful creatures? They would likely have good thoughts, warm feelings, and positive actions like playing and petting when they saw a furry friend. The pup is going to be happy and playful in that case, reinforcing the thoughts and feelings, driving actions, and strengthening those beliefs.  Thus, the cycle begins again.

But what if they were raised to be fearful of dogs or had had some tough interactions in the past? They would very likely feel scared or apprehensive when dogs were around. And how do you think they would act? Chances are afraid or withdrawn, which will probably make the dog apprehensive, skittish, or possibly aggressive, since it is feeling that nervous energy and reacting. And the cycle begins again, but this time reinforcing negative beliefs.

And now suppose instead of dogs, we were talking about our very own feelings.  Our own thoughts about ourselves, our self-concept.  Our thoughts and feelings become our actions, which become our belief systems, even about ourselves, creating cycles of connection or avoidance, shaping our sense of worth or devaluation .  These are the hidden forces at work in us and around us every day.   By growing attuned to this cycle we can better understand it, understand our own motivations which can seem so mysterious, and that of others.  By embracing the vulnerability and honesty with that reflection comes a new day and new way of being.

Finally, think about change and what can be, the limitless possibility.  Think about what you want to accomplish in the next month, the next 6 months, and the next year.  What kind of relationships do you want to have?  What kind of feelings do you want to have with those you love and care about?  What kind of health do you want to have?  Where do you want to be in your work and possibly more important, what kind of creative pursuits do you see?  The world is full of possibility and so are you!

Wishing you all the best!

-Dr. Jon

Author Dr. Jon Doctor, Entrepreneur, Founder of Dr. Jon Deam